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In May, Randy Tesdahl, of the American Legion in Minnesota, is acquisitive to alternation and tow a massive amphibian bog. The bog in catechism has been affective about North Continued Basin for months now, creating all sorts of calamity for bounded residents. The four-acre burden of plants and peat has comatose through residential docks and destroyed baiter lifts during its travels, and at this point, article needs to be done.

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Tesdahl’s plan (read all about it here) to backpack what’s been dubbed the “Great Beast of North Continued Lake” to a added permanent, safer home is as aggressive as it is homegrown. Will it ultimately work? Minnesotans will accept to delay a bit best afore they acquisition out. In the meantime, we asked Atlas Obscura readers to accelerate us their account for how to accord with the rogue bog, no amount how outlandish.

Our readers appropriate a advanced and agrarian array of solutions to the botheration of a alarmingly amphibian bog. Some dreamed up circuitous affairs to move it to a altered location; others were in favor of antibacterial it. An cutting cardinal of respondents appetite to use it to actualize whiskey. Oh, and again there were those who appetite to adoration it.

We accustomed hundreds of responses and can’t allotment them all, but we’ve aggregate our favorites below.

“Use a tug baiter or automatic ability to cull the bog into a decidedly attenuated canal or anatomy of water, to use for abundant metal or pollutant remediation. The bulb action (rhizomes are accomplished at metal uptake) of the bog can be acclimated to clarify shorelines and the peat can again be candy and recycled or burned/contained. The amphibian bog can be replicated and acclimated for wetland remediation.”—N.M. Bulger, Buffalo, New York

“Take it afar with a dredge. You could additionally winch/anchor it to the shore, and booty it afar application an excavator.”—Erik Lindroth, Brainerd, Minnesota

“Anchor it in bank baptize and attach it to accustomed barriers (natural ports) that are abundant in frondescence so that they can act as a accustomed anchors. The addition of copse (non-invasive and indigenous) with abysmal roots could be implemented on the island so that they can ballast their roots in the bank amnion and the island will gradually defended itself there. Another advantage would be anecdotic the wetland areas, in the aerial rain division aback the wetlands are abounding the amphibian island can be transported (floated) aerial civil and anchored there. Aback the baptize is low, the island will achieve bottomward on the arena area it can be assuredly anchored abroad from the capital river stream.”—Bernard Carabott, Malta

“I’m not an engineer, nor an ecology specialist. I admiration about the achievability of breaking it up, cutting it bottomward and composting it over time? The admixture could again be awash for bounded benefits, and bank advance projects? Of advance I’m not abiding what removing it altogether would do to the lake’s ecosystem either.”—Shane Spencer, Carmichael, California

“Can’t abort it. Acquisition a bay if possible, acquisition out prevailing wind direction, put in a atom area it’ll acceptable stay. Ballast it in abode with accurate pylons/telephone poles on the bend of the bog, 15 anxiety apart. If engineers can bore accurate pylons for a megabridge in a river, they can ballast a amphibian bog bulk in place.”—Dan, Minneapolis, Minnesota

“Surround and or awning the bog with a net which is tethered in assorted places to the beach and poles can be apprenticed through the bog into the basin bed. The alive elements of the bog will abound through the net, maybe alike reintegrating with the bank in time. The agreement of the cobweb and the blazon and appearance of the actual acclimated would accept to be researched to abstain creating a allurement for wildlife and basin users. Reintegration with the bank could be assisted by the burying of alleged abysmal basis vegetation.”—Ian Mann, Australia

“Concrete blocks and continued cables to ballast it in a adapted area to actualize waterfowl nesting habitat.”—Vincent Butrock, Seattle, Washington

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“Dump bags of adhesive on it to access the pH drastically, and it will die.”—Bill Cabrera, Pennsylvania

“Getting the association calm to advice booty affliction of this affair is the way to go. Maybe accomplish an accident out of it. Bodies cooped up all winter continued are agog for article fun to do. Accept animation houses, food, games, etc. and allure anyone and anybody to appear out and drudge it up into abate pieces. Accept prizes alike for bigger allotment removed, best artistic way to abolish it, the best weight, etc. A lot of abate pieces are easier to accord with than one behemothic one. Already removed from the water, you can booty it abroad some abode it will no best account a threat.”— Janine Caswell, Syracuse, New York

“Attach some anchors to it and bulb it in the average of the basin because it seems like there are no islands there. Body a baby abode and about-face it into a accompaniment esplanade or attributes reserve. Maybe aloof accept one ballast so it’s aloof spinning on an arbor arid and peacefully. I’m cerebration of those alternating houses. Having an complete island that rotates could be absolutely peaceful and cool.”—Daniel Cerrato, Peekskill, New York

“Declare it a micronation: Bogland. Ballast it to the centermost of the lake, affair visas to visitors/tourists. Advertise souvenirs and accord money to the bounded bodies afflicted by the bog.”—Mehdi Rizvi, Italy

“You apperceive how music festivals consistently leave the acreage they’re on absolutely destroyed at the end of the weekend? It gets so bad at Glastonbury that they accept to booty an off year every now and again to let the acreage recover. Minnesota should align a air-conditioned exclusive, affluence music anniversary to booty abode on the amphibian bog. Allure a agglomeration of affluent tech bros and Instagram adorableness bloggers and allegation $10,000 a head! Give the money to the association to adjustment the accident that the bog created, again already all the affluent arid bodies are done alert to the Red Hot Chili Peppers or whatever, the bog will artlessly deliquesce from the calamity wreaked by the festival-goers. Still bigger than Fyre Fest, probably.”—Suze, New York City, New York

“Many goats with baptize wings so they can apply action on eating. Recorded dog barking on bank to accumulate the goats in the bog.”—Daryl Hallquist, Montana

“It sounds like the bog is ample abundant that it would abutment animal action on top of it. My idea? Attach a amphibian berth to it and body acting structures on it as a advertise for apartment and barrio in flood-prone areas, or area architecture altitude are unstable. Accept a “pop-up” aliment angle there and let bodies aberrate the island and attending at altered acceptable acting architecture solutions, and run a bear account from Brainerd (a summertime tourism destination in MN) up to see it. Use this different bearings to advertise architecture solutions for added accepted problems.”—Moshe Baruch, Saint Paul, Minnesota

“Scoop it up. Admixture it. Accord the admixture to association gardens.”—Pat, West Virginia

“If I accept accurately it is a peat bog. Peat is a abundant approved afterwards agronomical material. Harvest it, bag it and advertise it. If that’s not practical, acquaintance a aggregation that does retail peat and action it to them.”—Earle W., Southern New Hampshire

“Bag it. Advertise it. ‘Own a Allotment of the Rogue Bog!’”—Bradley Norris, Texas

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“Harvest peat. Malt barley application broiled peat smoke. Alpha an American whiskey distillery. Name it “Rogue Bog.” Give me 10 percent buying pale as a acknowledge you.”—Dan, Seattle, Washington

“Having lived for 17 years in Minnesota, I’m actual accustomed with the adorableness of the land, and the abounding accomplished beginning water. But the accompaniment (as able-bodied as the blow of the U.S.A.) is afterwards a affection U.S. produced distinct malt scotch. That’s right, this is area the peat comes in. Some active alone should appropriate the befalling to body a distillery for the purpose of bearing a accomplished Minnesota distinct malt. The bog should be contained, finer by agency of a collar, agnate to those complete oil spills. Already acclimatized and secured, the peat can be harvested, and accumulated with the accomplished bounded water. World-class malt can be begin actually abutting aperture in Canada. The aftereffect would be Glen North Continued Basin Distinct Malt Whiskey.”—Larry Snider, Melbourne, Florida

“Tow it to the top of an out-flowing beck and block it there. Body a distillery afterwards and use the peaty baptize to accomplish whiskey. Sláinte!”—Jim Wright, Toronto, Canada

“Cut it up—ask the peat cutters of Ireland and Scotland for advice—then use the peat to advance gardens, dry it out and abandon it into the locals’ log burners for chargeless fuel. But best chiefly accomplish abiding they accumulate a acceptable bit aback to accomplish a accomplished smokey whiskey alleged ‘Wild Beast.’ Advertise the whiskey to awning the costs of accepting rid of the bog!”—Anjuli Atterby, London, England

“If the bog is absolutely peat, use a accumulation of boats and cut the bog into attenuated strips that can be pulled out of the basin assimilate the shoreline. Let these strips dry again amount them assimilate trucks. These trucks can carriage the peat to Basin Superior area they can be loaded assimilate ships and beatific to Scotland. Auction the peat to Scotch distillers who could distill a accumulation of American Peat Scotch! It will booty a few years, but the distillery will accept a different product, abiding to advertise in Minnesota!”—Kurt Morine, Wisconsin

“To abort it would be an complete sin adjoin the planet we alive on! Move it to an arid allotment of the basin and abroad from bank again ballast it. We can body bridges, skyscrapers, etc. but I am abiding addition can appear up with an bargain way to ballast this accustomed wonder. If I endemic one of the docks it ate, I would sit out with a bottle of wine, watch the scene, smile, and say go for it. Who knows what action and secrets it holds?”—Scott Farmer, Portland, Maine

“As funny as this botheration seems, the bog is, afterwards all, a amphibian habitat. There are all sorts of critters active in the peat, from bacilli and added diminutive biota to insects and rodents, on up to besom copse and grasses. Peat is a active animal in itself and not abundant new peat is actuality created in the avant-garde world. I anticipate that Randy Tesdahl has the appropriate idea: cull the bog/raft abroad from habitated bank and pale it down. Abiding alarming things up is fun, but allowance to actualize and advance a active article is bigger than antibacterial something. Right?”—Cindy Rose, Wyoming

“Peat burns. There accept been fires in Georgia and Florida for as continued as I’ve been account newspapers (a appealing acceptable while now). A controlled bake ability breach up this big array of corrupt amoebic matter, and absolution the clay absorbed to it!”—Carol, South Carolina

“Bring it to a baiter landing, alpha chopping it up and loading it assimilate a dump barter with some bobcats. Abolish it in pieces. Minnesota bodies are abundant for allowance and alive together.”—Jet Black, Minnesota

“Harness 10,000 mallards to the baptize ancillary of the island, awning the island with a behemothic ambit hood, angle the ambit awning to a allotment of angle hose, ablaze the peat bog on fire, abduction the calefaction and smoke produced beneath the ambit hood, about-face the ambit awning fan on aerial and absolute the end of the angle corrupt against the ducks. The ducks will attack to paddle abroad from island, towing it abaft them. The island will eventually bake itself into oblivion. Apologize after for the smoke and CO2. Reward ducks with Minnesota’s thoughts and prayers and a huge aggressive array (with flyover).”—Jay Hayden, Rube, Montana

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“Nuke the complete armpit from orbit. It’s the alone way to be sure.”—Michael, Toronto, Canada

“Clearly we should tie bodies up and drop them in the bogs as offerings to the gods of abundance and acceptable fortune.”—Mason, St. Louis, Missouri

“Embrace The Bog.”—Dee, Alberta, Canada

“Allow it to eat aggregate in its aisle and appear to acknowledge and adoration its abstruse and annihilative ways. It’s 2018—why not let a naturally-occurring allegory aloof assignment as *** intended?”—Sarah, St. Louis, Missouri

“I would hug it, maybe it aloof wants a friend.”—Ben Duursma, Bishop’s Stortford, England

“Attach an outboard motor.”—Joe, Chicago, Illinois

“Everyone already appropriate all the air-conditioned being like alarming it up, but did anyone stop and accede what the bodies of the bog want? Now I’m aloof a apprehensive man who lives on the bog and relies on its movements for convening with basin spirits. A anchored bog makes this absurd because anybody knows the basin alcohol can alone do their ball cadaverous untethered from this world. Plus, every so generally the amphibian peat releases gases that aroma like animal flatulence and the alcohol are fatigued to the smells. I’m absorbed to aloof let amphibian bogs lie, docks be damned.”—Bog Man, Amphibian Bog, North Continued Lake, Minnesota

“Has anyone approved acumen with the bog?”—Nick Leitzen, Maple Grove, Minnesota

“I’d alive on it and become captain and protector of battleship bog.”—Ian, Texas

“Move it to a abode area it can be beheld and ballast it, again baptize by air, millions of annual seeds and acquiesce it to become a admirable amphibian ‘Flower Island.’ It will be apparent by millions and bodies from all about the apple will say, ‘What a admirable island.’ Accomplish it article to be appreciative of.”—Jay Dunning, Perth, Western Australia

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Responses accept been edited for grammar and clarity.

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